Try Keeping a Journal

Try keeping a journal when dealing with a declining parent or loved one. The purpose of a journal is to keep track of the facts of your elderly loved one’s condition and to record your own experiences. This may include your thoughts and feelings about your situation, your loved one, or any aspect of your life, present or past. It’s an outlet where you can express thoughts that you can’t or don’t want to talk to someone else about. Expressing yourself through writing can help you process your thoughts making communication with relatives, care givers and health professionals more effective.

Keeping a journal can also be useful to an elderly or ill person dealing with incapacity or a new living situation with a live-in-care worker. People living alone can also use a journal to remember things, pass requests on to their family and live-in-care workers.

You can use paper, a notebook, a sketchbook, or word processor or anything else that suits you. Don’t think of yourself as a writer. Don’t try to be profound or get caught up in spelling, grammar, or censorship. Write what you want, when you want. Create a safe place for yourself in your Journal.

To get started:
• Tell the story of your day or the day of your parent or loved one.
• Make lists. What happened? What has to happen? What steps need to be taken? What needs to get purchased? What paper work has to get done?
• Be philosophical and/or spiritual. What’s on your mind? What do you think about life, illness and even death?
• Plot out Conversations. Write outlines of conversations, things that you should say with your loved one, your family, or anyone else? Plot the purpose of each conversation? State any questions or concerns that you may have? Mention any specific issues that need to be addressed.

With a bit of effort the journal will help you get focused and create a treasure to remember a challenging but important time in your family’s history. Journaling is just one tool to help family members, the older or ill person and home-care-worker communicate better.

1 comment September 1st, 2009